None of us gets things right the first time, all of the time. However, we must have done enough right in life to get us this far, right? And many of those things we did, we smashed. But we perfectionists are so in touch with our failings that we don’t see the wins.
So appreciate that you are truly enough, it may be difficult to believe, but you are OK; you are fine.
So, how do we counteract the inner perfectionist?
- Set realistic standards for yourself. That includes being realistic about what you can achieve through these Peps. Simply, if a Pep causes you to pause and rethink your behaviour towards drinking, then accept it’s a step in the right direction. If you thought these Peps would have all the answers to changing your fortunes, you should set more realistic standards for yourself (See SMART goals Pep).
- Pay attention to your self-talk. You’ve already started noticing your thoughts and feelings by being more mindful. Beware of the words “should” and “must”; they are a surefire way to burden you with unrealistic expectations. We’ll explore this subject more in the coming Peps, but for now, be open, check your attitudes and don’t believe everything you tell yourself.
- Celebrate every achievement, particularly those things that just got you over the line. And don’t overlook the importance of incremental changes. All the tiny wins, especially the sketchy ones, are all progress in the right direction, and celebrating them resets your expectations of what good looks like.